Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Jackie Gleason Isn't Dead Yet

Entertainment venues such as the Jackie Gleason Theater in Miami used to be named as such – after a person of interest and it was both commemorative and honorable to do so. Today, thanks to out of control marketing, our entertainment venues are named after corporations. These names are not only obnoxious but also confusing. Every time the venue is acquired by a new corporation, the name of the building is changed to match the corporation name – as in the Office Depot Center here in greater Fort Lauderdale. But wait, is that still the name? I heard an advertisement for something to be held at the Target Center – is that the same place? Or is the Target Center a new building I didn’t know about? You can see where the confusion lies. The Jackie Gleason Theater has been called that since I’ve lived here and I know exactly where it is.

Marketing has always been annoying to me but I suspect this trend is also irritating to many others. It is a practice that needs to stop immediately. Let the corporations that own the venue put up a huge logo on the building – I don’t really care about that. But the name of the facility should always be the same. I’ve heard it is bad luck to change the name of a boat – it can’t be good for a building either. If you want people to show up at your event – let them easily know where it is.

I think the Office Depot Center (Target Center?) would be much better named something recognizable and permanent – like the denbec Center. It does have a ring to it.

Thursday, May 24, 2007

Who Knew All It Takes is Money

This new immigration policy the administration has come up with strikes me as very odd. In a nutshell it says all they have to do is go back to their native country, apply for legal status, pay a $5000.00 fine and stay out of trouble.

If all it takes is money I wonder how much it would cost for homosexuals to become real citizens with the same rights as everyone else? But I digress.

I’ve done a bit of thinking about this immigration issue and here is what I came up with. We have a lot of illegal immigrants in our country for one reason only – we were ineffective at monitoring our borders, ports, and airports. We basically dropped the ball when it comes to protecting our borders and a lot of people are here now. Do we really believe that these people will now just go back home and pay a fine and come back? Do we realize how much $5000.00 is to the poor immigrants that are here? According to President Bush, they are here doing the jobs Americans don’t want when in fact they are here doing the jobs we won’t do at those low wages. And they are supporting their entire families here and at home with those low wages. $5000.00 is a lot of money for this group of people. Who would volunteer to go through such a hassle when they are already here, already working, and already hard to track down? And I think requiring a fee like that will only promote the business of smuggling. It won’t work.

I hate to say it but I think the only solution we really have is amnesty for those already here. Then we need to figure out a way to give those already here a legal way to work and a way to tax them accordingly. We also need to do a MUCH better job of protecting our borders, ports, and airports. If we continue to fail in that mission, we will always have this problem. Our schools, hospitals, police force, and all social programs will be taxed to the limit by those that don’t pay taxes. By addressing the cause of the problem (the borders) and not the symptom (the illegal immigrants already here), we not only get closer to solving our immigration crises but also our terrorist crisis. Monitoring our borders is expensive (not as expensive as war) – but well worth the cost.

Does President Bush think we are stupid - or is it just him?

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Do police cars really need that many lights?

Flawed Logic Explained

I would like to use an IT analogy to illustrate why the logic of “fight them over there so we don’t have to fight them over here” is terribly flawed.

Let’s say I am trying to keep viruses and other threats out of my computer. Would it make sense for me to go out to all those computers on the Internet that are potential threats and try to remove the viruses from those machines before they can infect mine? Of course not because this would require a huge investment in time and resources and would probably still prove ineffective – I couldn’t possibly get to them all. While I am distracted by the huge task of violating other people’s machines that may or may not be a threat to me, I may be missing critical updates that would protect my own machine. A better way is to make sure my own machine is properly protected with virus software and other security measures that will prevent attacks no matter where they come from. I don’t really need to be that concerned about what other people have on their machines because I know for a fact mine is protected.

Our National security should be handled in the same way. We do this with good foreign policy, diligent intelligence, a strong and prepared military that is standing by – not somewhere else, and by strict and thorough protection of our borders, ports, and airports. If a country is deemed a potential threat, we need to be extra diligent in screening who visits us from those places. If “they” can’t get to us, they won’t be able to hurt us.

Wednesday, May 16, 2007


What has happened to men's shorts? They have gotten so long that they appear more like "high water" pants than shorts. Even competitive swimwear goes practically to the knee. The whole concept of shorts has been lost. Today's shorts don't keep you cool, don't let you move easier, or even keep you free of a bicycle chain. And if you wear them in the water they are heavy and take forever to dry. Plus the weird tan line you get looks just silly.

I miss the 80s when basketball shorts were thigh length and speedos were - well - speedos. Thank goodness gay men are not afraid to show themselves. We still wear shorter shorts and even regular speedos. We are both cool and hot. I'm sure women like to see men's legs too. If I were a woman - I'd be revolting!

Hell Burns Brighter

The fires of Hell got a little boost this week with the arrival of Jerry Falwell. At the risk of being as judgemental as he was, I just don't think he is going where he thought he was. I doubt seriously that Heaven has room for people filled with hatred for Gods own creations. This one man with his so called "moral majority" spread his special brand of hate like a plague. I pray for his sole and the soles of those he infected with his misguided rantings.

At least for now, we have one less homophobe on this earth. I wonder how long Pat Robertson will live?